TWO WRONGS

[Cropduster]

TWO WRONGS

My mother was born as a lefty,
left handed for all of her years.
Though teachers, in vain,
using torture and pain,
tried to 'fix' her, resulting in tears.

For lefties were seen to be evil,
so sinister in Latin speak.
Southpaw, gibble-fisted
genetically twisted
scoochy and squiffy and weak.

My father was also a lefty,
but when jobs required some height,
he'd reverse his stance,
swap his tools between hands,
and take to the task with his right.

At tennis, dad served while right handed,
'cause serving was above his head.
But when the ball landed,
he'd swap to left-handed
which drove his opponents quite mad.

At cricket, he bowled with his right arm,
but when he went out with the bat,
he faced cacky-handed
which got himself branded
a cheat and a switch hitting rat.

At work he would saw with his left hand,
but when driving nails into wood,
if the job was up high
he was 'right-handed guy',
'cause his left hand was no bloody good.

All three kids turned out as right handed,
though mum and dad both lefties be.
Two wrongs, so they say,
don't make a right - what the hey!
That's bullcrap - my parents made three.

Copyright (c) Allan Cropper September 2015

[r.magnay]

good one Allan... ...(.'that's bullcrap my...)

[Cropduster]

Thanks Ross. My proof reading leaves a lot to be desired

[Neville Briggs]

Good one Allan. Being the odd one out, I think is a very fertile field for the production of strength of character required for achievement.

Leonardo da Vinci was left handed and Robert Frost deliberately took the " road less travelled ' and Les Murray was the fat kid at school who got persecuted.

[Heather]

I enjoyed it too Allan. My father was forced to switch hands too.

Heather

[Cropduster]

Who with, Heather?

[Shelley Hansen]

Very clever, Allan!

Neville is right about Leo da Vinci - he actually invented a new style of handwriting, right to left, especially for left-handers. Closer to us, the current Prince William is also a lefty, as is David Cameron and also Barack Obama and ... Tony Abbott! And it's no barrier to fame - because they are joined by Robert di Niro, Angelina Jolie and Nicole Kidman!

But history is full of really sad stories - a few years ago I wrote a novella (unpublished) about Don Carlos of Spain, eldest son of King Philip II. He has always fascinated me because the historical accounts about him differ so much - many say he was a madman, a heretic and possessed by the Devil. While we can't be sure what sort of man he really was, we do know that he was both left-handed and an epileptic - both considered to be marks of the Devil in medieval times. So you have to wonder if the poor guy was unfairly labelled! He had the courage to stand up against the brutality of the Spanish Inquisition - which of course, sealed his fate.

I like your play on words about two wrongs not making a right - but your parents made three!

Cheers, Shelley

[Neville Briggs]

When I read the first line I thought for a second Allan's mother might have been a congenital socialist.

[Cropduster]

Love your work, Neville

My mother was told that if she did not vote Labor, she was not allowed in my grandfather's house...and he was serious!

Thanks Shelley. Barrack Obama, Davis Cameron, Tony Abbott...seems like a pretty sinister list to me

[Heather]

With himself Allan.

That was the first thing that came to my mind too Neville - until I read on.

Heather