Post
by Wendy Seddon » Tue Aug 09, 2011 2:33 pm
You knew he was coming, dogs started to bark
he was old and quite cranky a veritable nark
with his clipboard and folder tucked under his wing
and a hand held electrical power scanning thing.
He didn’t like dogs he had told me before .
A crescendo of barking was raising the floor.
That the dogs didn’t like him was easy to see.
Not the right bloke for this job I think you’ll agree
MKC
...and a few other things that he really hates,
he doesn't like fences or hedges or gates.
But give him a thingy that beeps and assesses
and he'll persevere, ignore such distresses!
Wen
Now dogs are good judges I tell you, what's more
they knew that he was coming, before he made the door.
So as he turned the handle they started to howl.
but what got him moving was the kelpies low growl.
He dropped the clipboard and froze right in his tracks
A little pool of water trickled from his underdaks
he vaulted the railing , cleared the garden in one bound
Hit the path at full speed, and sprawled on the ground.
BP
He swore and he cursed ''you'll pay, wait and see''
as he winced at the blood on his elbow and knee,
and just as he righted himself to his feet,
them dogs came a running, their job not complete.
Sue
The Kelpie, he tore off a piece of an arm
where the Silky latched on, was cause for alarm!
A yowling and yelping quite shattered the peace
the metre man praying the mad mutts would cease!
Wen
it was payback I suppose for this lazy blokes antics
for his incorrect bills had left most people frantic
at the humungous cost of electricity
so I reckon that this was his Karma you see
MKC
But his karma must wait; he had more he would build
and this time, no kidding, his blood would be spilled.
By post to the owner a court order came;
traumatic stress syndrome, the meter man's claim.
Irene
The courtroom was hushed as the Magistrate sat
the dog’s owner respectfully removed his hat
and said ‘Well your honour – this bloke is a curse
there’s not one dog that likes him and he makes it worse.
He yells and he shouts and he waves a big stick
and that riles the dogs up pretty dam quick
He makes such a song and dance each time he comes
that even the mildest dog goes for his bum."
MKC
Quite quickly on You Tube there bloomed a new fad,
a dance craze a favourite from babe to grandad
Firstly you squirm then you wriggle and tap,
you’re doing the metre man’s dance - the ‘bum rap’.
Wen
Wen de Rhymewriter There is nothing mundane about the ordinary.