ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

THE DRUMMER'S PROGRESS


O Major, Drum Major, Drum Major,dear sir,
I've practised the sticks and I've studied the beat
and got me a kilt and a sporran all neat.
I have a cool plan, it is thrillingly grand;
to play on the side drum and join in the band.
Dit derr, dit dit derr, dit dit derr de derr derr.

O Major, Drum Major, Drum Major, dear sir,
the skirl of the pipes is a heady delight
and flash of the tartans a glamorous sight.
Let's have your approval, just give the command !
to play my side drum in the Scottish pipe band.
Dit derr, dit dit derr. dit dit derr de derr derr.

O Major, Drum Major, Drum Major, old chum,
I'm having some trouble, please do understand,
I wanted to play the side drum in the band.
This featureless tub that you've given to me
won't make me the player that I hope to be.
Da dum pum, dum dum pum, dum dum pumpadum.

O Major, Drum Major, Drum Major, dear sir,
a tenor drum's awkward and heavy to hold,
it flusters my kilt and so lets in the cold.
The hair on my sporran gets tangled all wrong,
believe me ! the side drum is where I belong.
Dit derr, dit dit derr, dit dit derr de derr derr.

O Major, Drum Major, Drum Major, old chum,
this tenor drum thing is a wretched assemblage,
like hitting a tin with a sock full of porridge.
My fingers are aching, I'm bruised - you know why ?
while twirling the sticks I got hit in the eye!
Da dum, whirl whirl, dum, whirl whirl, dumpumpadum.

O Major, Drum Major, Drum Major, dear sir ,
I'm sorry to tell you, I'm filled with dismay;
the whirr of the side drum I wanted to play.
So stick that old tenor drum right up your dirk,
I'm now in a rock band - that's real drummer's work !
Dee doof doof dat, dee doof doof dat, dee doof doof dat, dee derrrr.





Neville

Aah Neville I love your sense of humour. Much enjoyed.

Heather

Goodonya Neville. I'm with Heather - delightful poem and wonderful sense of humour.

Jeff

Good one Neville I like it.

This poem has a good beat and you can get right into the rhythm, Drum Majors what do they know.

Rat a tatat- Rat a tatat- Rat a tat rat a tat rat a tatat

TTFN

...lay off the drummers Neville...I played in a country rock band for many years....well I didn't really play, I was the drummer!..

Ross, you poor dear.

No NO Ross you were the “Musician” the others just played guitars and keyboards.

TTFN

Thanks for the encouragement Heather and Maureen and Jeff.

Thanks Dave, I thought you would remember the old pipe band days ?

Ross. I have played the side drum in the brass band, drum kit in the pop group and the stage band, marched in the big parade with the marching band and even played timpani with the symphony orchestra decked out in my white bow tie and tuxedo.
The only thing I have never done is play in the Scottish Pipe Band.