ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

Always up for a challenge as Shelley knows so here is my Petrarchan sonnet. Not sure if I have grasped the concept completely but any suggestions and/or criticisms are welcome.



FULL OF TEARS ... Maureen Clifford © The #ScribblyBarkPoet
A Petrarchan Sonnet

Today I rose wearily from my bed
the sun shone brightly in the bluest sky
seen for a while - I had let life pass by
as melancholy overtook my head.
My mind had wandered back when I was wed
so long ago, another lifetime when
I still believed in happiness back then -
it had not from my body drained and bled.

Yes I know that happiness is fleeting
that love and trust do not walk hand in hand.
Dreams don't always come with explanations
and life and time gives us all a beating,
sometimes reality is not so grand.
Love cannot prevent recriminations

5.10.21

I think you've handled that challenge very well Maureen, I liked it!

Ron

I don't think I'll bother challenging you to anything Maureen.
You have certainly responded to this one with flying colours.

Love is often full of disappointment - they say.
Certainly makes a good subject for Sonnets.

Terry

Hi Maureen

Well done, you! Challenge posed, accepted and achieved!!

Because you did ask for feedback, just one thing ... in the sestet you have disturbed your consistency a little by introducing 4 feminine rhymes in among the masculine ones that dominate the remainder of the sonnet. These days rules are less strict with this kind of thing, as you know - but probably to be strictly correct the end line rhyme should remain masculine throughout, as that is the pattern you have established at the beginning.

But well done! The Petrarchan is not an easy structure to master.

Cheers
Shelley

Thanks everyone and thanks Shelley for the tip as well - I will bear that in mind and endeavour to improve.

Very poignant, Maureen - and I agree with everyone else here. Terry is right in that this is a good subject for sonnets, Shelley has given you excellent feedback on the rhyme pattern, and as Ron said, this is a challenge well met!

Thank you Catherine