Long or Short?

[Heather]

Which is more difficult to write - a poem with long lines or short lines?

Heather

[Neville Briggs]

How long is a piece of string ?

[Heather]

Off you go.....

[Maureen K Clifford]

wouldn't have thought it mattered - the amount of effort taken to write them is the same If you had 8 short lines and joined them together into 4 long lines the amount of energy expended to write them is exactly the same. Is this a trick question??

[Heather]

Not a trick question Maureen. It is a discussion on poetry.

Come on, someone who writes both. David perhaps?

[Bob Pacey]

I write them both it's fine you see
be they short or long's the same to me.
they tell me that longer is best
a theory that I'm yet to test.

Bob

[David Campbell]

Heather

Interesting question. I’ve never really thought about it much in terms of difficulty…it’s more a case of suitability. Shorter lines usually indicate a more staccato presentation, such as the series of strong images in your “And the Poppies Dance”. Short lines help to punch home a message, while longer ones can be useful with something slower and more reflective, or perhaps with a rolling rhythm…like “The Man From Snowy River”.

This is not set in concrete, though, because (as Maureen says) a poem with short lines can easily be transformed into one with long lines by joining lines together (possibly creating an internal rhyme)…and the reverse can also be done. Consider your poem, for example, if it had begun like this:

The click of shears and a golden fleece; a soldier’s gun and the wish for peace.
A young man’s pride and a father’s fears; a lover’s plea and a mother’s tears.
A call to arms and a Nation’s sons; the stench of death and the German guns.
The constant march as the troops advance; an ill wind blows on the fields of France.

Would it have been as effective? I think it works much better the way you’ve done it, but others may differ.

Technically speaking, both long and short can pose problems. Short can be difficult if you want to use an internal rhyme. For example, here’s the first stanza of my “The Photograph”:

The air is still, the night’s brisk chill
is banished by the dawn;
the eastern sky is blazoned by
the flush of life reborn.

That pattern can be hard to sustain. But it could also be written as:

The air is still, the night’s brisk chill is banished by the dawn;
the eastern sky is blazoned by the flush of life reborn.

Or even:

The air is still,
the night’s brisk chill
is banished by the dawn;
the eastern sky
is blazoned by
the flush of life reborn.

All are valid. I just thought the first version looked better and gave the reader most assistance regarding the way it should be read.

Deliberately longer lines, however, can create problems in terms of maintaining metre. It’s common in competitions to see poems with long lines where the writer simply loses track of where the stresses are supposed to fall, and so the result is a bit of a dog’s breakfast. This is about as far as I like to go in terms of length (19 syllables), a poem called “In the Beat of the Drums”:

When the sunset has gone from the hillsides, and the shadow of night slowly comes,
you can hear them, for they are still marching, to the sound of some far-distant drums.
In the silence their voices still whisper of the deeds that took place long ago,
and the breeze carries word of their story so that all who can hear it might know.

Each of those lines could be split into two parts (10 and 9), but it’s a reflective piece so the longer layout seemed more suitable. It’s a case of deciding what you’re comfortable with, and what impression you’d like to convey to the reader.

So I’m not coming down on one side or the other. It all depends on what you’re trying to achieve.

Cheers
David

[Heather]

Thanks David, Bob and Maureen.

I got to thinking about this question because more and more I find myself writing in short lines where I use phrases or fewer words to depict scene or story rather than full sentences.

I wasn't thinking so much about the same words arranged differently but comparing a poem with short lines - where very few words are used to show a picture compared to say The Man From Snowy River where words are used in language more representive of the way we talk.

I have written longer lines in the past but find myself more and more writing in shorter lines and having to be more economical with words, being limited by metre and rhyme and therefore having to be very, very selective with the words I use. I think there is possibly a bit more flexability with the longer lines of say 14 syllables than there is with half that many.

I'm presently working on something with 8 syllables in the first line and 7 in the second with an ABAB rhyming scheme so I am very confined with syallables and having to find the right rhyme for the story. It's a tricky little number. I don't know why I do it to myself really. Oh, well, yes I do, it's fun and I like a challenge where no man is involved!

Am I making any sense at all?

David me some advice on a poem and it was about where the natural breaks are in a line. That is one reason I am now splitting my lines into two and I think I get a better result that way. Probably no one else has any idea what I'm talking about David But I did take notice and I know I have one poem that when I read it there was something not quite right about it - and the metre and rhyme were perfect. It was that the natural break wasn't right - I couldn't split one line into two if I wanted to.

Have I confused every one yet? Good, my work here is done then.

Goodnight!

[Zondrae]

G'day Heather,

What a good idea. You have posed a question to make us stop and think about our writing. Thanks for the exercise. I, if no one else, need that.
Looking back over my work I see have used both short and long lines at different times. The longest lines I have ever used are 16 syllables. I find I seem to go in cycles and fall in a bit of a rut. Then I spot this and force myself to do something different. I also like the format of one fairly long line followed by one sorter line. I am not going to strain my brain at this time of day to dig out examples but my feeling is, that there is no right or wrong, only different.

I have found that some poems feel like they dictate their own format. Maybe this shows that I am not master of the craft. I can't really explane what I mean only that if I try to force the lines into any other form the 'soul' of the piece is lost. On occasion I have even found I have written something of about seven stanzas, having set (as I thought) the style in the first one or two stanzas but when I go to review it, there is a change of metre or length of line in about the third stanza and this second format is held right to the end.
When this happens I usually go back and change the first one or two to conform with the dominant form or style as this is often easier than changing the three or five that have already settled themselves.
I don't kid myself that I have the skill to sit down and say - right! this poem have nine stanzas with four lines of sixteen syllable each, an internal rhyme and an abab end rhyme. I usually start by writing a ist of facts or points that I wish to include and if I need to - I do some research and make further notes. Then I begin. I try to get an opening line that will raise interest in what happens next then I let the ideas run and fix up the format later. I suppose I am a lazy poet.

[manfredvijars]

Thanks David, Bob and Maureen.

... it's fun and I like a challenge where no man is involved! ....

David (gave) me some advice on a poem .....

No "Man" involved huh? ....