Rhyming verse

[Neville Briggs]

I was listening to a man ( Australian, dunno his name ) on a radio program who was discussing and presenting some of his poetry. The presenter asked him if he wrote rhyming poetry. The poet made a couple of interesting comments.

He said first that he didn't write rhyming poetry because rhyme was very hard to do well, and he couldn't do it well.

He commented that if the reader or listener can "see" the rhyme then it is bad rhyme.

He said that there are a few people in Australian poetry who can do rhyme well and many people who do it badly.

I didn't have time to listen to the whole program and hear his poetry, so I have no idea what it is like , except that it is obviously unrhymed .

Just food for thought. Don't assume that I agree or disagree.

[Bob Pacey]

so who was the man and what was the programme Nev ???

Amazed at what you can find on the internet ?

No good commenting if you do not have all the facts I'm not a pollie you know.


Bob

[Neville Briggs]

The program was on the ABC Radio National, called The Spirit of Things.

It was about a book of poetry called Light and Glorie an anthology by various poets.
The poems were inspired by the stained glass windows of St Bartholomews Church in Adelaide.
I am not sure which person made the comments, there were several readers. You can listen to it on-line on the Radio National web site if interested.

I suspect not a lot of interest from here Zondrae maybe.

[Bob Pacey]

Had a listen Nev always amazes me how they then to justify the inspiration for their works ?

With regards to the rhyming, I reckon he needs to get onto the bush poets site and have a read, ' Hard to keep the poem interesting and subtle " with rhyme

He refers to a poet called W H Auden who he says writes in rhyme and the rhyme is hard to pick so that makes it good ! I goggled him up and this is a sample of his work ?

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.

Pretty good hey bet no one can pick the rhyme it is so subtle !


I reckon we have some poets on the site who would eat him for breakfast

Anyway was an interesting listen for a Christmas Morn.

Cheers Bob

[manfredvijars]

... here we go again ... Learn from the Masters ...


LAWSON AND ME
THE NEVER FAR HOTEL
(c) Graham Fredriksen 1956 - 2010

Some years ago, I ‘utilised’ a Lawson character from his poem
“Since Then” for my sequel piece—“Farewell to Jack Ellis”.

I ran into Henry Lawson
....in the pub at Never Far;
he was sitting reading, paws on
....to some tomed vernacular.
He gave me half an eyeball
....with a disaffected glance,
then turned back to his ‘bible’,
....aptly titled Come-by-Chance.
There he continued sipping
....at his ‘bitter with a dash’,
the remnants of it dripping
....down the dregs of his moustache.

Though his mien was rather wary
....(quite aloof, you understand)
I approached the literary
....genius with proffered hand.
Here I mentioned that I’d punted
....round with words for quite a time,
that I often hemmed and hunted
....for the lines to turn a rhyme;
how I dreamed in ‘stops’ and ‘stresses’,
....how I plied the midnight nib,
then I probed the ‘wildernesses’
....of my literary ‘sib’.

I asked of ‘anapaestics’
....and of endings ‘feminine’,
and I prised him for the best tricks
....to fit words unwieldy in.
But I kept a ‘closet beak’ well
....on the fact (and here’s the ‘swizz’)
I had written once a sequel
....to a poem that was his!
I’d killed off a mate of Lawson’s
....in an ode of dire remorse,
and now figured it made more sense
....to avoid such intercourse.

I enquired if he’d seen Sweeney
....(or the Army of the Rear);
his brow turned shades of green, he
....mumbled: “Only in the mirr’r.”
So I asked if he was waiting
....for someone particular;
here he eyed me closely, stating:
....“Now I know just who you are!”
I could sense the penny dropping
....as he realised who I was,
and he shifted awkward, propping
....bar-wards for a better ‘pos’.

He upspoke with tones belying
....features hinting pending harm,
and he tweaked his ‘mo-stache’, eyeing
....me with calculating calm:
“I am waiting for Jack Ellis,”
....uttered he, “I doubt he’ll show,
for the ‘mulga wires’ tell us
....(here he stroked again his ‘mo’)
that you’ve got him dead and planted
....in a cemetery somewhere—
you take a lot for granted,
....lad, that I would want him there.

“He’s a man of my creation,
....(here his voice turned rather black)
he’s the backbone of a Nation,
....frontline of the Outside Track!
He’s a waltzer of Matilda,
....archetypal Out Back king—
and now he’s gone and filled a
....grave to sate your ‘rhymestering’!
’Tis presumptions there you’ve carried—
....and some crook ones, ay, you’ve made—
for if I should want him buried,
....boy-o, I shall swing the spade!

“I have had a word with Chisholm—
....A.R. handles all my ‘biz’—
and he says that PLAGIARISM
....would be close to what it is.
So, I’ll warn you, new chum writers,
....with your word-process machines,
you create your own damned ‘mighters’
....and your ‘mighter-not-have-beens’!
And you leave the lore and legends
....of the past back where they were,
and just where Jack’s pilgrimage ends
....is wherever I prefer!”
Well, I sputtered out a sorrowed
....kind of rank apology,

insisting I’d just borrowed
....Jack, I . . .“hadn’t stolen he”.
’Twas in nought but admiration
....for . . .“the way you turn a verse
prompted my appropriation
....of one of your characters.
I’d have never called it ‘bumming’,
....no, nor criminal, old mate—
anyway, you’re not forthcoming,
....contribution-wise, of late!”

Here he downed his ‘dash and bitter’,
....ordered one more . . .“with a dash!”,
and he shook his head a twitter,
....and he ruffled his moustache;
and he muttered quite a rum thing,
....slamming shut his Come-by-Chance,
and he glared at me with something
....like the sharp end of a lance:
“Of course I’ve not writ any!!—
....I’ve been DEAD these eighty years,
you blanky blank!!” . . . and then he
....gives a lurch and disappears.

I walked out through the verandah
....where the sunset slinks away;
I have made—yes—exits grander,
....but today was not my day.
And I swung upon my horse in
....front the pub at Never Far,
and pondered on why Lawson
....‘dropped his bundle’ in the bar.
He’s a poet few can equal;
....still, I’m sure I’ll make my mark,
for I’m writing now a sequel
....to “The Man from Ironbark”!!
---

[Maureen K Clifford]

Masterful writing I reckon - always a delight to read Grahams works.

[Neville Briggs]

Bob, there's nothing outlandish about Auden's rhymes there, perfectly traditional and "orthodox" rhyme and iambic metre.

Bob, I think what that fellow on the radio was referring to is clanging rhyme. Where people write rather ordinary sentences which end in a rhyming word that stands out and overshadows the sound of the lines.
I was at a bush poetry event where one person was reciting a poem and he got almost to the end of a line and most of the audience shouted out the rhyming word as he got to it !! it was so obvious. That's pretty feeble stuff.

[Bob Pacey]

Thats not the way I took his comments Nev, I listened to the second poet ( cannot remember her name )and her rhymes were almost hidden in the poem with very little emphasis on the rhyme but it was still and enjoyable listen.

So when I do my short poem about toilets and cannot find a rhyme with hearted and the kids all yell out farted that is not a good thing !!!





Bob

[Neville Briggs]

I suppose we have to leave room for comical shenanigans as required.

[Stephen Whiteside]

Heather, have you seen "Four Weddings and a Funeral"? The poem features there. The film led to a great revival in interest in Auden.