ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

Religious Renovations -

Amen.

The time now is suitable to revert to past times,
one only needs cover to shelter from climes
that can be inclement with hot sun and cloudburst,
return to theological grass roots when parishioners came first.

Dismantle stone churches, all cathedrals as well
they really aren’t necessary to keep people from hell -
sell off the structures, internal fittings and such.
Value should be high - they could be worth much.

More money could be used for improving the lot
of all creeds and customs that have not as yet got
relief by religion, for it’s lost the way,
now does not make life better for many each day.

They starve as they shelter from wickedness and sin
Popes, Deacons , all clergy do not now often win
the hearts and the minds, as once Shepherds tended sheep,
at least those poor Shepherds cared for each bleat.

In merry old England a church has been built
no need for any ministers to ever feel guilt
prayers can be intoned at any old place
no one ever, will fall from good grace
for saying their prayers at a pulpit of plastic,
perhaps they will find it is really fantastic
getting back to basics whilst tending their flock,
keeping parishioners well away from the dock.

This pump up church has stained windows, air sprayed
also plastic pews for the people have been made,
sitting in an air-chair or under a tree
is, as far as I know, quite acceptable to he.
His minions on earth have lost their main aim,
give them all plastic churches to get back in the game
for those that need their ministries, also their prayers
to help in their healing before moving upstairs.

Amen.

(c). Rimeriter.15/5/03.

We are not supposed to be doing free verse in this web site mate.

Thanks Neville, I've tried to remove it via the edit system without success.

Suggestions please.
Jim.

No need to remove it Jim. I'm not in charge of anything ( thank goodness they say )
I reckon we can survive different approaches.

I just wondered about it, it looked a bit like those ones that Ogden Nash used to do with the informal lines ending in rhyming words
I was wondering what you might say about your approach to this type of construction.

Mate, I have heard the name, Ogden Nash that is, but other than that, have no knowledge of his writings.

As you can see, I put it together back in 03.
Goodness knows what influence I may have been under back then.

i found it in my Archive drive whilst searching for 'stuff' suitable to use to celebrate the tenth Anni. of my New Writers' Group.
However, I can recall reading an article about the inflatable church, which seemed to me to be a great innovation.
Why not use the 'bricks and stone' money to aid the needy !!

I rarely rant. But maybe this is one.

"ooroo"
Jim.

Dear oh dear, Neville,

you are confusing me. There is rhyme in the above verse. Therefore how can it be free verse? Is the fact that the lines are differing in length the criteria for free verse?

At first glance this poem does not appear to me to be 'free' in any way. There are four lines in most of the stanzas. The two longer ones could easily have a space placed to make them conform. (I can do this if you wish, Jim. Or even delete the whole post if you wish.) Please advise. By pm if you prefer.

Zondrae and Jim have you not woken up to the fact that our Neville is a stirrer ????





Bob

wotchoo torkin bout Bob

Zondrae. Rhyme is a sort of musical decoration , there is plenty of metred poetry that has no rhyme there is some free verse that includes rhyme. Rhyme does not make poetry. Poetry does not need to be rhymed, RHYME IS OPTIONAL.
Most metred verse has regular measured beats ( or accents or stresses ) and most metred verse has regular line breaks, that is the lines are mostly the same length.
METRE IS NOT OPTIONAL. POETRY IS METRED VERSE. Well that's my manifesto.

In free verse all poetic devices can be present, alliteration, rhyme, consonance, repeats,
heightened language and SHOULD HAVE a pattern of stresses or accents.
The difference with free verse is that the writer devises a pattern of their own to place the line lengths, the line breaks and the patterns of accents. this is done according to the writers own choices not to a predetermined pattern as in , say, ballad form which is common in bush poetry.
Some free verse seems to have abandoned any commitment to metre and in my opinion this is bad verse. My belief is that any verse, to be poetry, MUST have some metric structure.

In the verse posted here, if you read it carfefully noting the accents, you will see that it does not have a regular pattern. Hence I suggested that the writer may have intended to use an informal pattern of his own devising.