QR'S GETTING CLASSY

[Jeff Thorpe]

Queensland Rail's been in hot water lately with two major distruptions on the Brisbane rail network. I wrote the following verse before these occurred however, it seems to "fit the bill"

QR’S GETTING CLASSY

Accoutrements is a word that’s really seldom heard,
those of similar meaning are normally preferred.
Bits and pieces, odds and ends, baggage, all would do
for these are terms in general that we are all used to.

Thus, I was amazed to hear an announcement say
by QR to its passengers just the other day,
“Please take all accoutrements when alighting from this service”
this from Queensland Rail? I began to feel quite nervous.

I wondered “what’s this talk of service, I thought it was a train
and what’s all this accoutrements – like Pauline, please explain!”
all a whole lot different from “platform on the right”
methinks the commuters got a mighty fright.

So, it appears that QR now has linguists on its staff,
is management sorting the wheat out from the chaff?
Perhaps they may be better served to cut out all this mime
and work on a solution to run their trains on time.


Jeff Thorpe 23 February 2012 ©

[Neville Briggs]

Good observation Jeff, somehow when bureaucrats have to make public notices they get all ponderously verbose.

Remember when there was a notice forbidding us to expectorate on the floor in public areas. I wouldn't dare

[Jeff Thorpe]

Yes Neville, I remember that notice. I also always remember one at the Irish Club in Brisbane announcing "Please do not walk on the floor" Admittedly, parts of the flooring were under repair. Topical with St Pat's day tomorrow.

Cheers, Jeff

[Heather]

Funny Jeff.

Heather

[Dave Smith]

We were disembarking from a airplane one day and the pilot came on and said,

"Please take all your belongings with you or you will leave them behind."

TTFN

[r.magnay]

... Yeah good one Jeff, makes you wonder sometimes just what people think they achieve by using 'big' words to say the same thing they could say with normal speech!

Hey Dave, that came from the bloke who was driving that plane?..... ...by the way, unless you were in America, which would explain the statement, it is an aeroplane.........just though I would chuck that in...

[Dave Smith]

Yeah Ross that was rhe driver I was glad we were getting off.

I tried aeroplane but my spell checker chucked it out??? Maybe the run by the same bloke.

TTFN

PS
Russ an' Amy say G'day.