'Flouncing' - Glenny and Hully
Posted: Thu Jun 30, 2011 2:35 pm
Was looking for something completely different and found this old gem today - must have been from a few years ago and not sure which version of which site it was on - but it was fun.....Glenny, hope you don't mund me reproducing your poem here...and my apologies for those who have seen this before...
The Principal Rule of Flouncing - Glenny Palmer
The principal rule of the flounce
is to stick your nose in the air,
then the head turns right, as the shoulder lifts
for the chin to linger there.
Take your left hand & grasp at your skirt,
as you start the turn on your heel,
render measured bounce to befit good flounce,
and then 'hmpff', but never squeal.
It's critical all of your bits,
that wobble, like bottoms & ....kind,
are synchronised in a quivered rise,
to distract the victim's mind.
But the ultimate tool of good flounce
to succeed, it has to be this,
with a flick of hair & a backwards stare,
you blow the swine a kiss.
(Glenny Palmer)
The Flounce - hully
It all seemed alright in the hotel that night
When the room went suddenly quiet
And all turned to stare at the newlywed pair
Engaged in a their own private riot
It was something to do with who thought that who
Could consult a celebrity diet
And at the end of the shout, the sheila flounced out
With great style…and none could deny it.
Then Smithy piped up as he lifted his cup
“for that nose lift, I’ll give her an eight!”
“and the chin on the shoulder could not have been colder”
Said Dave “the timing was great”
But the hand grasping skirt, caused the boys to revert
To their drinks and a healthy debate
Their ranks were divided, until they decided
That she’d done it too badly to rate
But the turn on the heel, they agreed, was unreal
And Jim Jeffries gave her a ‘Nine”
He said “I’ve seen flounces, but such measured bounces
And ‘hmmmphhs’ are purely divine”
Old Pete was still giggling, recalling the wiggling
Bits, all regarded as “fine”
But the last quivered rise, caused some to surmise
It was more by good luck than design
But all of those drinkers and well noted thinkers
Could not at all fault the last action
And all had agreed that the grace and the speed
Of the move caused a mild distraction
The flick of the hair with that last backward stare
And the kiss was a major attraction
So, for flouncing at men, they scored her a ten
- Which at least gave her some satisfaction
h
The Principal Rule of Flouncing - Glenny Palmer
The principal rule of the flounce
is to stick your nose in the air,
then the head turns right, as the shoulder lifts
for the chin to linger there.
Take your left hand & grasp at your skirt,
as you start the turn on your heel,
render measured bounce to befit good flounce,
and then 'hmpff', but never squeal.
It's critical all of your bits,
that wobble, like bottoms & ....kind,
are synchronised in a quivered rise,
to distract the victim's mind.
But the ultimate tool of good flounce
to succeed, it has to be this,
with a flick of hair & a backwards stare,
you blow the swine a kiss.
(Glenny Palmer)
The Flounce - hully
It all seemed alright in the hotel that night
When the room went suddenly quiet
And all turned to stare at the newlywed pair
Engaged in a their own private riot
It was something to do with who thought that who
Could consult a celebrity diet
And at the end of the shout, the sheila flounced out
With great style…and none could deny it.
Then Smithy piped up as he lifted his cup
“for that nose lift, I’ll give her an eight!”
“and the chin on the shoulder could not have been colder”
Said Dave “the timing was great”
But the hand grasping skirt, caused the boys to revert
To their drinks and a healthy debate
Their ranks were divided, until they decided
That she’d done it too badly to rate
But the turn on the heel, they agreed, was unreal
And Jim Jeffries gave her a ‘Nine”
He said “I’ve seen flounces, but such measured bounces
And ‘hmmmphhs’ are purely divine”
Old Pete was still giggling, recalling the wiggling
Bits, all regarded as “fine”
But the last quivered rise, caused some to surmise
It was more by good luck than design
But all of those drinkers and well noted thinkers
Could not at all fault the last action
And all had agreed that the grace and the speed
Of the move caused a mild distraction
The flick of the hair with that last backward stare
And the kiss was a major attraction
So, for flouncing at men, they scored her a ten
- Which at least gave her some satisfaction
h