ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

I like to write about the true values in life, which promptrd me to write this poem.
I thought about breaking it into 8 line stanzas, but would leave only 4 lines for last verse, suggestions please.

TRUE FRIENDS

Sometimes in life, the road we walk,
will twist and turn and wend,
with steep inclines to test our strength,
descents that see no end.
We'll make decisions, sometimes wrong,
our rights we will defend,
and if we're blessed, along the way,
be guided by a friend
Someone who's there to hold our hand,
to share our joys and tears,
to guide us through those troubled times
and help erase our fears.
A friend who'll be there silent,
in those moments of despair,
who'll feel our pain, help heal our wounds,
and shower us with care.
They'll share the bond thats held between
the loyalist of friends,
and ride it's waves,[and sometimes fall]
but always make amends.
And if the tables were to turn,
this friend would always know,
reciprocation of these deeds,
unquestioned, you would show.
So if in life, you have been blessed
with friendship of this kind,
hold onto it, respect it's worth,
it's rare and hard to find.
Sue Pearce©
2011

Is this the nice Marty?????? Bodies??????
Sue

Would this work Sue - a few minor alterations.


TRUE FRIENDS

Sometimes in life, the road we walk, will twist and turn and wend,
with steep inclines to test our strength, descents that see no end.

We'll make decisions, sometimes wrong, our rights we will defend,
and if we're blessed, along the way, be guided by a friend.
Someone who's there to hold our hand, to share our joys and tears,
and guide us through those troubled times and help erase our fears.

A friend who'll be there - silent in those moments of despair,
who'll feel our pain, help heal our wounds, and shower us with care.
They'll share the bond that’s held between the most loyal of friends,
and ride it's waves - and sometimes fall - but always make amends.

And if the tables were to turn, this friend would always know,
reciprocation of these deeds, unquestioned, you would show.
So if in life, you have been blessed with friendship of this kind,
hold onto it, respect it's worth, it’s rare and hard to find.

Those steep inclines that test our strength, those descents without end
are often just the roads of life, that twist and turn and wend.

Ohhh Maureen, when you write it like that it flows so much smoother, you are such a clever person at putting words together, mine was a bit bumpy. Thank you for the suggestions. Now, if I can take some of that on board so it still feels like my work, that is where I always come unstuck, I look at peoples suggestions and think, yes, thats it, but when I write it down it doesn't feel like mine anymore. I just need to get past these barriers. Think I might have to attend some of the writing workshops.
Once again, many thanks.
Sue

You are right Sue sometimes it loses your own unique style but remember we only suggest changes how you use them is up to you.

Maureen has a real knack of being able to stand back and see the big picture which is a great help.


Cheers Bob

Do I??

Good work Sue. I have a suggestion for you to think about. You've told us in general terms about friendship, do you have a very specific example of an encounter with a particular friend that shows how these things that you described are translated into action ?
Just a suggestion.

Showing rather then telling is one of the goals that I am struggling to achieve, I think it makes more effective poetry. (I might get it one day )

Yes, Maureen you do, you are very gifted.
Neville, To write about something with passion, one needs to have experienced that thing, so yes, I could improve on this by including that experience, thanks for the advice.
Sue

Lovely poem Sue and not a truer word.

Heather

When we lived in Moura we spent time at so many peoples houses we were never home and used to take a bus to touch footy with 32 adults and about 40 kids.

Moved back to Rocky and never seems to have the same number of contacts

Country Towns are great for friends.

Bob