Why Kick a Moo Cow?
- Stephen Whiteside
- Posts: 3784
- Joined: Sat Nov 27, 2010 1:07 pm
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Why Kick a Moo Cow?
Why Kick a Moo Cow?
The judge eyed the defendant as he stood there in the dock.
The crime had been so senseless, he was in a state of shock.
“Before I pass your sentence, could you please just tell me why
You chose to kick a cow? It will be hard but, please, still try.”
Why kick a moo cow?
Why punch a baa lamb?
Why poke a bleat goat?
What does it matter now?
Why jab a neigh horse?
Why bump a bark dog?
Why hit a miaow cat?
Why kick a moo cow?
The judge recoiled in horror. Than he shook his head. “It’s sad.
Take him off to hospital. The poor chap is quite mad.”
They placed him in a jacket, and they marched him down the hall,
And listened to the echoes as they bounced from wall to wall.
Why jump on a jellyfish?
Why dribble on a dolphin?
Why strangle a stingray?
Why whack a whale?
Why box a budgerigar?
Why maul a magpie?
Why scratch a swan?
Why eviscerate an egret?
Why put a headlock on a heron?
Why wallop a wallaby?
Why biff a buffalo?
etc…etc…
© Stephen Whiteside. 01.07.2018
The judge eyed the defendant as he stood there in the dock.
The crime had been so senseless, he was in a state of shock.
“Before I pass your sentence, could you please just tell me why
You chose to kick a cow? It will be hard but, please, still try.”
Why kick a moo cow?
Why punch a baa lamb?
Why poke a bleat goat?
What does it matter now?
Why jab a neigh horse?
Why bump a bark dog?
Why hit a miaow cat?
Why kick a moo cow?
The judge recoiled in horror. Than he shook his head. “It’s sad.
Take him off to hospital. The poor chap is quite mad.”
They placed him in a jacket, and they marched him down the hall,
And listened to the echoes as they bounced from wall to wall.
Why jump on a jellyfish?
Why dribble on a dolphin?
Why strangle a stingray?
Why whack a whale?
Why box a budgerigar?
Why maul a magpie?
Why scratch a swan?
Why eviscerate an egret?
Why put a headlock on a heron?
Why wallop a wallaby?
Why biff a buffalo?
etc…etc…
© Stephen Whiteside. 01.07.2018
Stephen Whiteside, Australian Poet and Writer
http://www.stephenwhiteside.com.au
http://www.stephenwhiteside.com.au
- Catherine Lee
- Posts: 1304
- Joined: Mon May 14, 2012 9:47 pm
- Location: Thailand
Re: Why Kick a Moo Cow?
Somehow I knew you'd rise to that particular challenge, Stephen! ...And yes, why indeed, for all of the above?!
- Stephen Whiteside
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- Joined: Sat Nov 27, 2010 1:07 pm
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Re: Why Kick a Moo Cow?
Such senseless cruelty, Catherine! Very sad.
Stephen Whiteside, Australian Poet and Writer
http://www.stephenwhiteside.com.au
http://www.stephenwhiteside.com.au
- Shelley Hansen
- Posts: 2224
- Joined: Sun May 04, 2014 5:39 pm
- Location: Maryborough, Queensland
- Contact:
Re: Why Kick a Moo Cow?
(Groan) ... Look at what you’ve done, Catherine. Did you ever read the story of Pandora’s box???
Shelley Hansen
Lady of Lines
http://www.shelleyhansen.com
"Look fer yer profits in the 'earts o' friends,
fer 'atin' never paid no dividends."
(CJ Dennis "The Mooch o' Life")
Lady of Lines
http://www.shelleyhansen.com
"Look fer yer profits in the 'earts o' friends,
fer 'atin' never paid no dividends."
(CJ Dennis "The Mooch o' Life")
- Catherine Lee
- Posts: 1304
- Joined: Mon May 14, 2012 9:47 pm
- Location: Thailand
Re: Why Kick a Moo Cow?
Hmm...yes indeed - one must be careful what one wishes for!
- Stephen Whiteside
- Posts: 3784
- Joined: Sat Nov 27, 2010 1:07 pm
- Contact:
Re: Why Kick a Moo Cow?
Why torture a triantiwontigongolope?
Stephen Whiteside, Australian Poet and Writer
http://www.stephenwhiteside.com.au
http://www.stephenwhiteside.com.au
- Shelley Hansen
- Posts: 2224
- Joined: Sun May 04, 2014 5:39 pm
- Location: Maryborough, Queensland
- Contact:
Re: Why Kick a Moo Cow?
Oh, try!
Tri
Triantiwonti ...
Tri
Triantiwonti ...
Shelley Hansen
Lady of Lines
http://www.shelleyhansen.com
"Look fer yer profits in the 'earts o' friends,
fer 'atin' never paid no dividends."
(CJ Dennis "The Mooch o' Life")
Lady of Lines
http://www.shelleyhansen.com
"Look fer yer profits in the 'earts o' friends,
fer 'atin' never paid no dividends."
(CJ Dennis "The Mooch o' Life")
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- Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2010 3:54 pm
Re: Why Kick a Moo Cow?
Hi Stephen
I can recall a relatively successful race horse in the mid 1990s named Waikikamukau. Apparently derived from a place in New Zealand. I'd wager the race callers had trouble initially with the pronunciation.
Liked your poem.
Regards, jeff
I can recall a relatively successful race horse in the mid 1990s named Waikikamukau. Apparently derived from a place in New Zealand. I'd wager the race callers had trouble initially with the pronunciation.
Liked your poem.
Regards, jeff
- Maureen K Clifford
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Re: Why Kick a Moo Cow?
and here I was thinking whykickamoocow was one of those wacky New Zealand place names and then seems it was according to Jeff's post above Waikikamukau
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I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/
I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.
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Re: Why Kick a Moo Cow?
Jeff is spot on.
That horse was racing not that many years ago - the race callers pronounced it as 'Why Kick A Moo Cow'
Not that I'm a punter myself but I clearly remember it; and had to smile at the humour of those cunning Kiwi's.
Cheers
Terry
That horse was racing not that many years ago - the race callers pronounced it as 'Why Kick A Moo Cow'
Not that I'm a punter myself but I clearly remember it; and had to smile at the humour of those cunning Kiwi's.
Cheers
Terry