Big Bob From Splitters Creek.

[thestoryteller]

BIG BOB FROM SPLITTERS CREEK

It was big Bob from Splitters Creek
that hit the Brisbane Show.
He’d brought the wife, a buxom lass,
and fourteen kids in tow.
Big Bob had reared this tribe of kids
by grazing pure bred beef
and sought to buy a breeding bull
as his had come to grief.

A feature of the show this year
was some exotic breed,
The answer to fertility
and experts all agreed.
This prize bull had a fancy name,
a Brahman I recall.
The agent down at Splitters Creek
said, “Stands near six feet tall.”

Bob lined up at the ticket box
as some sharp spieler cried,
“Roll up, roll up and see him folks
the Brahman bulls inside!”
Well Bob, the wife and all the kids
they took up most the queue.
Bob hoped he’d put enough aside
t’would cost a bob or two.

“How many?” asked the ticket man,
“there’s lot of room inside.
“Just two adults and fourteen kids,”
was how old Bob replied.
The ticket man looked up in shock
and viewed Bob’s progeny.
“You telling me that mob’s all yours,
that’s quite a fam’ly tree!”

“There any chance of discount mate
for families?” asked Bob.
The ticket man just looked in awe
at Bob, his wife and mob.
“Good sir,” he said, “you wait right here,
for this is what I’ll do.
I’ll bring that bull out here right now
to meet the likes of you.

While on our Laughter & Tears tour of western Queensland with my wife Chris and my dad, I was happy to see the country looking so much better than it had in previous years and seeing the Brahman Stud signs along the way brought back to mind and old yarn I had heard some years ago.

© Merv Webster

From the book Laughter & Tears from the Bush.