Ipswich Poetry Feast

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Maureen K Clifford
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Ipswich Poetry Feast

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Tue Oct 17, 2017 7:25 pm

Congratulations to Terry Piggott, David Campbell, Leonie Parker and Noel Stallard who all did well in the recent 2017 Competition
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

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David Campbell
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Re: Ipswich Poetry Feast

Post by David Campbell » Tue Oct 17, 2017 8:51 pm

Thanks Maureen, although anyone checking out the Ipswich website should note that my poem has not been posted as originally written. It's in the "Other Poetry" section and it's rhyming verse (a quirk of this competition), but something's gone wrong in putting it online. It should be laid out as seven 7-line stanzas, but all but one of the stanza-breaks have disappeared, as have two of the line-breaks. I've written and asked them to fix it but, until that happens, this is the correct version. (An interesting question: "How might it have fared in the bush poetry section?")

An Even Greater Fear

© David Campbell

The beast devoured the dead at dawn, my son,
a scavenger now lost in silver dreams
that hide the horror of the night,
when all that you have ever been and done
became as nothing in a hell that seems
to burn anew now morning’s light
betrays us one by one.

Their eyes will not meet mine, they look away
in silence at the home they cannot see —
the olive groves that once defined
Aleppo’s wealth, the laughter of each day,
the children plucking fruit from tree to tree —
but you have gone, so they are blind,
and have no words to say.

You never knew, my son, the years of toil
before our groves were victims of the war,
destroyed to force us from our land,
deprive us of the gift of life, the oil
that nurtured all of those who’d gone before,
yet now no more than desert sand
that mocks our ravaged soil.

A thousand years have heard the ancient tales
your father’s kin could tell to trace their line
from Saladin, yet none remain
where any fleeting chance of ceasefire fails,
nor does the future promise any sign
that peace will be allowed to reign,
for only death prevails.

And yet the suffering that brought us here
is fading mist among the olive trees
when sunrise heats Aleppo’s dawn,
for now I know an even greater fear,
a terror spawned by evil times like these
when all that I can do is mourn
the one I hold most dear.

Where are you now, my son? Do you embrace
your father and your brothers with a smile
in some enchanted paradise,
a mystical, quite perfect, holy place
where man’s brutality cannot defile
your innocence? Is that the price
I pay to run this race?

Too late, Australian sailors come. Their eyes
stare down at us, so curious, as though
we’re specimens trapped under glass,
their faces grim, yet etched with faint surprise
that we are still afloat, while here below
we see they will not let us pass,
and hope, defeated, dies.

Terry
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Re: Ipswich Poetry Feast

Post by Terry » Wed Oct 18, 2017 10:58 am

G/day -and congratulations David

I notice that both of my poems are just laid out in one continuous stanza.
I suspect that they have been retyped - I haven't read them right through.

Strangely I also noticed one of Leonies poem seem to be in it's correct form.

They were probably just wanting to get the results out quickly,
and will present them correctly later.

Also thanks Maureen for passing on that info.

Cheers

Terry

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David Campbell
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Re: Ipswich Poetry Feast

Post by David Campbell » Wed Oct 18, 2017 11:27 am

Hi Terry

Congratulations on both of yours. I'd suggest you contact them if you want the poems set out correctly. I've just had an email to say mine has been fixed...a formatting problem that arose while transferring it online, so I don't think there's any retyping involved. If you don't tell them, I suspect the poems will stay as they are.

Cheers
David

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Catherine Lee
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Re: Ipswich Poetry Feast

Post by Catherine Lee » Wed Oct 18, 2017 7:49 pm

Fantastic news - Congratulations to you all...and Wow, David - that is one powerful poem!

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Shelley
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Re: Ipswich Poetry Feast

Post by Shelley » Wed Oct 18, 2017 9:53 pm

Congratulations Terry, David, Leonie and Noel ...

David - I echo Catherine’s sentiments ... when I read your poem on the website (even in its oddly reproduced format which I gathered was not how you wrote it) it really gave me one of those “WOW!” moments. How would it have fared in the bush poetry section? I don’t know. It is written on a subject intensely relevant in today’s Australia, and it has rhyme and consistent (if unusual) rhythm, so in my book it meets the criteria. However I suspect some judges would find it challenging enough to overlook in favour of more traditionally structured and themed poems.

As for the poems being displayed incorrectly, I note as you did that a number (but not all) of them have all their verses run together in a very hard-to-read format. However, I also counted at least three badly mis-spelled words and grammatical errors, from poets who don’t usually slip up in that area. So I wonder how much editing was done before posting on the website?

Hopefully they will make all of the necessary corrections.

Cheers
Shelley
Shelley Hansen
Lady of Lines
http://www.shelleyhansen.com

"Look fer yer profits in the 'earts o' friends,
fer 'atin' never paid no dividends."
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Terry
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Re: Ipswich Poetry Feast

Post by Terry » Thu Oct 19, 2017 10:16 am

Thanks David, Catherine & Shelley

I notice that every line in my poem 'Top Camp' has been capitalized but not in my other poem 'The Lady of the Lakes'

I haven't gone right through the poems yet (too lazy) but have noticed the odd the odd little thing is a bit out, I have emailed them but so far nothing has changed. I did wonder if I should offer to email them attached copies of the poems?

Cheers

Terry

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Maureen K Clifford
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Re: Ipswich Poetry Feast

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Thu Oct 19, 2017 3:06 pm

For those of you whose work has been incorrectly reproduced on the IPF site I would suggest that you send the correct format to sue.cicolini@ipswich.qld.gov.au and ask her if she could correct it for you. Thank you Shelley for the update.
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

Terry
Posts: 2709
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2010 6:53 pm

Re: Ipswich Poetry Feast

Post by Terry » Sat Oct 21, 2017 3:20 pm

Hi Maureen

I did contact them although I wasn't that worried.
They have sorted most it out and I'm happy to leave it at that;
I'm more than happy just to have done as well I did.

I read David's poem - certainly nothing wrong with it as far as rhyming goes David,
and a really nice poem as well - I suppose it would depend on what theme,
or style a particular comp called for, as it's a bit different to what usually passes as Bush poetry.

It's falls into that thin dividing line that I suspect will always be there in the eyes of some.

Cheers

Terry

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David Campbell
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Re: Ipswich Poetry Feast

Post by David Campbell » Mon Oct 30, 2017 2:47 pm

Thank you for those comments. I asked the question about the poem and the bush poetry section because Ipswich is an unusual competition. As traditional verse is accepted and regularly awarded (even winning first prize) in the ‘Other Poetry’ category it forces entrants to decide where to put their rhyming poems. How do we make that decision? In my case it was purely the subject-matter. Although it clearly relates to Australia, I decided it was unlikely to get anywhere in the bush poetry section. And, having read the poems that succeeded in that section, I reckon it was the right decision. As Terry says “it’s a bit different to what usually passes as Bush poetry”, and Shelley’s observation that some judges might find it “challenging enough to overlook” is also relevant.

I’m raising this because I know that others are making similar decisions, in other words deciding that there are some issues that are perhaps too “challenging” for bush poetry competitions. So here’s another question: what are the implications of that for bush poetry?

Cheers
David

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