Collaborative Poem 8 - The Plastered Cockatoo

[Jasper Brush]

G'day Irene.

Nuh, that exactly what I want. Every poet read the poem and consider the words.

Make suggestions and changes where necessary.

The poems going well we headed out-of -doors and are on a hurdy gurdy. I think the Aussie humour is to the fore.

Marty's

when found my toes were broken, by a Bustard on a bike.
"YEOW! You bloody Bustard! I am tryna find the bar!"

Irene carried on the story

I hopped upon his battered bike -
then plowed into a drunken swan, who rose up - full of fight!!

Maureen brought a nice twist.

when a left hook got him ‘neath the beak, thrown by a Powerful Owl

Sue contributed some nice play on words and hidden black humour.

''you better turn your bowlegs round, get out of here, go, scoot''
the swan just kept on raven,as he clutched his throbbing jaw,

And Marty B keeps slipping them in.

Now I'm talon you no lie the eagle had a vice like grip .
No matter how he struggled the eagle's hold he couldn't slip,

Maureen shifts into comical imagery.

'Aaark Aaark' he cried and 'AAARK' again - and hopped and did a jig
as he watched the swan and eagle disappear into a fig,

Sue back with a friendly Pel, e can

A peacock standing at the bar said, ''settle down old man,
emu will come and sort this out, with his friend Pel, e can''

Hm Marty lends a little colour to the scene

a seagull, shag n' a pelican, a sight you've never seen
be carefull how you say it now - that's three birds (keep it clean )

Considering I only started this avian extravaganza yesterday this poem is flying along at a great rate.

I thank you all. There are a few bad eggs threaded between the lines.

Regards,

John

[Maureen K Clifford]

The Plastered Cockatoo


I shifted down to second when a pub came into view
then stopped beside the road and thought I’d like to sink a few.
Dark brown the pub was painted, and the roof a shade of blue,
the name across the gable was `The Plastered Cockatoo.’

In stifling heat, my dried out mouth intensified my thirst
So crashing through the double doors, into the bar I burst.
I stopped dead in my startled tracks; a strange sight I did see -
All types of birds adorned the bar, the size and height of me.

A preening dove came into view, a-pushing out her chest
Said ‘Want a thrill, oh lover boy? Come join me in my nest.’
I said, ‘I’m very sorry love, I’m in here for a beer,
And really don’t appreciate you cooing in my ear.’
JB

I weaved amongst the gathered throng - of feathered friends alike
when found my toes were broken, by a Bustard on a bike.
"YEOW! You bloody Bustard! I am tryna find the bar!"
"Well sorry, mate. Ya wanna dink? It's really not too far"
W

I hopped upon his battered bike - we dodged and ducked and weaved;
a crazy ride - I wondered if I'd ever be believed.
We scattered feathers right and left, birds flew above in fright,
then plowed into a drunken swan, who rose up - full of fight!!
IC


That drunken swan it seemed had been there all the day imbibing
on Swan lager, though that’s unconfirmed and on that I’m surmising.
He thought he fancied fisticuffs but then let out a howl
when a left hook got him ‘neath the beak, thrown by a Powerful Owl
MKC


Well, the owl, unruffled, glass in hand, then to the swan did hoot,
''you better turn your bowlegs round, get out of here, go, scoot''
the swan just kept on raven,as he clutched his throbbing jaw,
when from behind, an eagle, swiftly grabbed him with his claw
Sue

Now I'm talon you no lie the eagle had a vice like grip .
No matter how he struggled the eagle's hold he couldnt slip,
he flapped his wings and carried off the swan towards the park
which prompted the old crow behind the bar to utter .. .that phrase that got Graham Kennedy in so much trouble
MB

'Aaark Aaark' he cried and 'AAARK' again - and hopped and did a jig
as he watched the swan and eagle disappear into a fig,
where he knew a stroppy kookaburra would have the final word
which he did – he saw that Eagle off – and loud laughter was heard.
MKC

The crow, he cawed out ''kookaburra, wheres that jackass now,
he's left behind a great big bill, it must be settled, now''
A peacock standing at the bar said, ''settle down old man,
emu will come and sort this out, with his friend Pel, e can''
S

I had to wet me whistle, I needed ice-cold beer
distracted though by such a sight that looked a little queer
a seagull, shag n' a pelican, a sight you've never seen
be carefull how you say it now - that's three birds (keep it clean )
w


“Oh here comes Emu now” he said “he’ll soon set things to right,
he’s bloody fast Mate on his feet although he can’t take flight.
He’ll make that Kookaburra bloke pay cash for his bar tabs
else old Pelican might make him into fast food for the crabs.”
MKC

[mummsie]

''There's just a mynah issue'' crow said, ''swan's the one who owes''
on herron these words, jackass turned and dove, and punched crows nose,
he grabbed that tab and terned to crow and wedged it in his bill,
said ''I dont owe a dollar, bird, your just a babbler, dill''

[Jasper Brush]

G'day.

Well, Maureen's got a bit of stoush going.

Ha,Ha.

Sue your verse is a classic

''There's just a mynah issue'' crow said, ''swan's the one who owes''
on herron these words, jackass turned and dove, and punched crows nose,
he grabbed that tab and terned to crow and wedged it in his bill,
said ''I dont owe a dollar, bird, your just a babbler, dill''

Ha, ha, ha ,ha.

My first stanza has to be amended.

Dark brown the pub was painted, and the roof a shade of blue,
the name across the gable was `The Plastered Cockatoo.’

TO

Dark brown the pub was painted, and the roof a shade of blue,
the name across the gable: 'The Plastered Cockatoo.’

We are making very good progress.

I'll try and write a verse or two.

Don't forget jail birds.

I thought the wind down might be -sunset the birds fly home to roost.

The bar scene fades away-- all thats left is a clock on a pole in a wool/shearing/shed or building.

The last few verses kinda- something like-- If you ever driving .... and you have a raging thirst ... blah blah blah.

Cheers to all

John

[mummsie]

Big Albatross, a law enforcer, said,''come here lets Chat,
I havn't got a Curlew who's wrong, so call it quits, thats that,
you'll do a Stint as Jail Birds if you cannot show some Spine,
Bill, drinks are on me, Swallow down, put double rum in mine''

[warooa]

then kooka said, "hey Emu's here all dressed in fancy dress!"
a big bone casque upon his head that really did impress
and brilliant feathers; red and blue which once were brown and hairy
"ay this aint fancy dress, it's me - the Southern Cassowary"

[Bob Pacey]

Then slowly as the throbbing pain cleared my foggy head
I realised I was laying naked in the shearing shed
My pay check had dissipated and my mind was feelin glum
I vowed that I would never more touch that demon rum.

Bob

[Maureen K Clifford]

The Plastered Cockatoo

I shifted down to second when a pub came into view
then stopped beside the road and thought I’d like to sink a few.
Dark brown the pub was painted, and the roof a shade of blue,
the name across the gable `The Plastered Cockatoo.’

In stifling heat, my dried out mouth intensified my thirst
So crashing through the double doors, into the bar I burst.
I stopped dead in my startled tracks; a strange sight I did see -
All types of birds adorned the bar, the size and height of me.

A preening dove came into view, a-pushing out her chest
Said ‘Want a thrill, oh lover boy? Come join me in my nest.’
I said, ‘I’m very sorry love, I’m in here for a beer,
And really don’t appreciate you cooing in my ear.’
JB
I weaved amongst the gathered throng - of feathered friends alike
when found my toes were broken, by a Bustard on a bike.
"YEOW! You bloody Bustard! I am tryna find the bar!"
"Well sorry, mate. Ya wanna dink? It's really not too far"
W
I hopped upon his battered bike - we dodged and ducked and weaved;
a crazy ride - I wondered if I'd ever be believed.
We scattered feathers right and left, birds flew above in fright,
then plowed into a drunken swan, who rose up - full of fight!!
IC
That drunken swan it seemed had been there all the day imbibing
on Swan lager, though that’s unconfirmed and on that I’m surmising.
He thought he fancied fisticuffs but then let out a howl
when a left hook got him ‘neath the beak, thrown by a Powerful Owl
MKC
Well, the owl, unruffled, glass in hand, then to the swan did hoot,
''you better turn your bowlegs round, get out of here, go, scoot''
the swan just kept on raven, as he clutched his throbbing jaw,
when from behind, an eagle, swiftly grabbed him with his claw
Sue
Now I'm talon you no lie the eagle had a vice like grip .
No matter how he struggled the eagle's hold he couldn’t slip,
he flapped his wings and carried off the swan towards the park
which prompted the old crow behind the bar to utter .. .that phrase that got Graham Kennedy in so much trouble
MB
'Aaark Aaark' he cried and 'AAARK' again - and hopped and did a jig
as he watched the swan and eagle disappear into a fig,
where he knew a stroppy kookaburra would have the final word
which he did – he saw that Eagle off – and loud laughter was heard.
MKC
The crow, he cawed out ''kookaburra, where’s that jackass now,
he's left behind a great big bill, it must be settled, now''
A peacock standing at the bar said, ''settle down old man,
emu will come and sort this out, with his friend Pel, e can''
S
I had to wet me whistle, I needed ice-cold beer
distracted though by such a sight that looked a little queer
a seagull, shag n' a pelican, a sight you've never seen
be careful how you say it now - that's three birds (keep it clean )
w
“Oh here comes Emu now” he said “he’ll soon set things to right,
he’s bloody fast Mate on his feet although he can’t take flight.
He’ll make that Kookaburra bloke pay cash for his bar tabs
else old Pelican might make him into fast food for the crabs.”
MKC
''There's just a mynah issue'' crow said, ''swan's the one who owes''
on herron these words, jackass turned and dove, and punched crows nose,
he grabbed that tab and terned to crow and wedged it in his bill,
said ''I don’t owe a dollar, bird, your just a babbler, dill''

Big Albatross, a law enforcer, said, ‘come here lets Chat,
I haven’t got a Curlew who's wrong, so call it quits, that’s that,
you'll do a Stint as Jail Birds if you cannot show some Spine,
Bill, drinks are on me, Swallow down, put double rum in mine''
Sue
then kooka said, "hey Emu's here all dressed in fancy dress!"
a big bone casque upon his head that really did impress
and brilliant feathers; red and blue which once were brown and hairy
"ay this ain’t fancy dress, it's me - the Southern Cassowary"
W
Then slowly as the throbbing pain cleared my foggy head
I realised I was laying naked in the shearing shed
My pay check had dissipated and my mind was feelin’ glum
I vowed that I would never more touch that demon rum.
Bob
So here the story endeth and a wiser man am I
since I ‘ve taken to the wagon and my lusting lips are dry.
That demon grog just turns my head and doesn’t leave me richer
I won’t see bar birds any more – just feathered – I’m a twitcher.
mkc

[mummsie]

I love it, Bob take note, thats what the rum will do to you.
Thanks for that John
Sue

[Maureen K Clifford]

These collaborations IMO are always such fun Sue and I agree - thank you John for kicking it off....did it take you to places you have never been?

Cheers

Maureen