Homework 18-2 Mongrel dog

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Neville Briggs
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Re: Homework 18-2 Mongrel dog

Post by Neville Briggs » Fri Feb 15, 2013 1:56 pm

I like it.

But I would prefer without the last two stanzas, I don't think they are needed. I think it has the right "gothic" touch without those. Just my opinion which doesn't need to be noticed.
Neville
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.

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Maureen K Clifford
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Re: Homework 18-2 Mongrel dog

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Fri Feb 15, 2013 2:07 pm

I like it to Marty - well done.

I also think you could ditch the last verse without taking away from it. To me the last verse reduces its impact and I don't think it is really a humorous poem as such. Like the dog I reckon this one has good bones and also room for expansion should you desire to do so. Try spending 10 minutes and see where it takes you :lol: :lol:

Thank you for having a shot at it :D - I was getting worried :?

Cheers

Maureen
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

Neville Briggs
Posts: 6946
Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:08 pm
Location: Here

Re: Homework 18-2 Mongrel dog

Post by Neville Briggs » Fri Feb 15, 2013 5:22 pm

Now I feel guilty. you don't have to do what I suggest. :oops:

What do you think of it now Marty ?
Neville
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.

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Maureen K Clifford
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Re: Homework 18-2 Mongrel dog

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Tue Feb 19, 2013 10:57 am

Keep playing Marty and having fun - the homework is designed to sharpen the mind not become a chore that has to be done, but I am always happy to see you having a go at the homework because you come up with some pearlers. :D
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

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