The White Stetson

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ALANM
Posts: 96
Joined: Sat Oct 12, 2019 2:57 pm
Location: North Queensland

The White Stetson

Post by ALANM » Sun Jan 12, 2020 1:58 pm

The White Stetson
(By Alan McCosker September 2019)

Of the ringers I knew in days long past by
most faces and names have long gone away
but now and then something will trigger my mind
and bring back a story, ‘bout a mate back in time

Now keith was a sharp, flamboyant young cowboy
always neat and tidy and sometimes quite rowdy
sat good on a stockhorse and could stick to a rough’un
but his main claim to fame was his lovely white stetson

That hat was a ripper, man what a big show
high crowned and wide brimmed and whiter than snow
jammed on his head snugly never once did it fall
whether goin’ full gallop or spurrin’ an outlaw

I recall a time musterin’ on the station’s back reaches
when young keith came gallopin’ up to the coaches
it seemed he had thrown a big old piker bullock
we turned the mob ‘round and made our way back

Nearly all of the time, it would mostly be found
the bullock still lying there prone on the ground
the thrower would dismount and roll him right over
cut the tips off his horns, then let him up to recover

This time however, by the time we got back
he’d managed to stand up and loosen the strap
hoppin’ and skippin’ he’d moved himself ‘round
and stood there defiant and pawin’ the ground

We couldn’t get near him, the ground was quite slick
the head stockman said “ boys, I’ll show you a trick ”
“ I’ll toss in my hat, when he spins ‘round to gore it ”
“ jump off, grab his tail, come on keith, you do it ”

He tossed in his hat, which the bullock ignored
so we tossed in another, which was also ignored
that bullock stayed focused on the ringers around
soon all of our hats were strewn on the ground

All but for keith’s stetson, still snug on his head
we all started to call out and urged him to shed
astride of his stock horse he sat there steadfast
then we got better of him and he threw it in, at last

It landed just under the bullock’s big nose
sat there on it’s crown like a big old white rose
he’ll gore it for sure, was the thought of the crew
he’ll trample and snot it, be no longer like new

But no, he ignored it and spun right around
shakin’ his long horns and pawin’ the ground
then liftin’ his tail he started to back up
and shat in keiths hat…. fillin’ it right up

For a moment in silence we looked at our chum
he’d gone very quiet, his expression quite glum
his beautiful stetson was a green shit stained mess
we all tried not to laugh but we did, I confess

The moral of this story is there to be told
the hat of a ringer, should not be coloured so bold
sweat stained old brown hats, are best in a bullfight
white hats look awful, when covered in bullshite.

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Shelley Hansen
Posts: 2224
Joined: Sun May 04, 2014 5:39 pm
Location: Maryborough, Queensland
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Re: The White Stetson

Post by Shelley Hansen » Mon Feb 03, 2020 3:09 pm

Oh dear, a "pungent" yarn indeed, Alan!

I'm an Akubra girl myself ;)
Shelley Hansen
Lady of Lines
http://www.shelleyhansen.com

"Look fer yer profits in the 'earts o' friends,
fer 'atin' never paid no dividends."
(CJ Dennis "The Mooch o' Life")

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