THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

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Keith H
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri May 27, 2016 9:59 am

THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

Post by Keith H » Wed Jun 01, 2016 9:48 am

I am a member of the SES & part of our role is rescue of domestic animals.
One Tuesday night, while at training, we got request for assistance for a dog tapped in a storm drain. This was the outcome.

THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

Keith HAYCRAFT

From kneeling in the pit I got mud on my knees
while James laid down on the job, if you please!
Or story? We got called to a dog in a drain,
the callers' relief when we arrived was plain.

Called away from Training to attend to this need;
all hyped up and ready to do our good deed!
We had been called before to a similar job
and we looked forward to helping this dog.

There wasn't room for me to see down that long pipe
so James lay down to see if he might.
In the meantime he called for rope and a strong torch
to shine down the pipe to see where the dog was caught.

Meanwhile, Ian and I walked to the other end
of the pipe to see what light we could shed.
The pipe was half filled with water but we could hear
a sort of barking sound, but nowhere near.

There had been a concrete cover over the pit;
water at the other end, more than a bit.
The sound the callers heard was not that of a dog;
it was the two toned croak of a bloody frog!

Heather

Re: THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

Post by Heather » Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:36 am

Welcome to the forum Keith. I enjoyed your story and I wasn't expecting the ending and had a little chuckle. I guess you call it "practice" or "training".

Heather :)

Keith H
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri May 27, 2016 9:59 am

Re: THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

Post by Keith H » Wed Jun 01, 2016 3:38 pm

Thanks for allowing me onto your Forum Heather & for your kind words.
Training is nearly every Tuesday night & it is not unknown for us to get a job whilst there, tis was the second of the d/frog "rescues" we had performed in a few weeks.

Heather

Re: THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

Post by Heather » Wed Jun 01, 2016 8:06 pm

Why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself Keith. There's an Introduction section at the top of the main page.

Heather :)

Terry
Posts: 2739
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2010 6:53 pm

Re: THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

Post by Terry » Wed Jun 01, 2016 8:50 pm

G/day Keith
Glad to see you braving it and posting a poem - hope to see more from you later.

Terry

Keith H
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri May 27, 2016 9:59 am

Re: THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

Post by Keith H » Thu Jun 02, 2016 12:38 pm

I am hoping for some feedback on my works, so thank you to all who have commented.
Some of my peers at work are on my back to get a book published so any aid I might get in the area will be welcome. I have several hundred to choose from & when I try to choose which ones I might include in any book I find improvements which might be made to many of them.

Terry
Posts: 2739
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2010 6:53 pm

Re: THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

Post by Terry » Thu Jun 02, 2016 3:30 pm

G/day Keith

I'm not for a moment suggesting there's anything wrong with your writing as it is,
but if you want to get people to make comments, Just ask mate.
But don't be offended if you get a couple of well meant tips that might appear a bit critical,
we've all had a few of them, but that's how you learn and improve your writing.

Cheers

Terry

Bob Pacey
Moderator
Posts: 7463
Joined: Thu Dec 02, 2010 9:18 am
Location: Yeppoon

Re: THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

Post by Bob Pacey » Thu Jun 02, 2016 4:37 pm

Yes as terry said Keith if you want comments warts and all just ask we have a lot of experts on the forum. ( ex is finished and a spurt is a drip under pressure ) :lol: :lol: :lol:


Remember any suggestions are yours to use or loose as required. Well all but Nevilles anyway.

Hey have a go at Maureens homework prompts as well.


Bobbo
The purpose in life is to have fun.
After you grasp that everything else seems insignificant !!!

Neville Briggs
Posts: 6853
Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:08 pm
Location: Here

Re: THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

Post by Neville Briggs » Thu Jun 02, 2016 8:46 pm

Now don't you worry about me Bob, you just watch out for Laurie Daley on the warpath for those refs.
Neville
Singleton Bush Poets.

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Cropduster
Posts: 604
Joined: Sun Jan 18, 2015 1:13 pm

Re: THE LITTLE GREEN DOG

Post by Cropduster » Fri Jun 03, 2016 9:12 am

Hi Keith

Welcome and thanks for posting your poem. I too did not see the end coming, and it brought a smile to my dial.

I have been helped along the way with suggestions about meter and rhyme, and hopefully my poetry has improved somewhat since joining this forum.

I look forward to reading more of your poems.

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