THE FIRST REVIEW - Graham Fredriksen

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manfredvijars

THE FIRST REVIEW - Graham Fredriksen

Post by manfredvijars » Tue Feb 22, 2011 9:07 pm

THE FIRST REVIEW
(c) Graham Fredriksen 1956 - 2010
Last edited by manfredvijars on Wed Jun 08, 2016 11:40 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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Bellobazza
Posts: 173
Joined: Fri Nov 05, 2010 3:48 pm

Re: THE FIRST REVIEW - Graham Fredriksen

Post by Bellobazza » Tue Feb 22, 2011 9:47 pm

A man who knew the 'rules' AND how best to bend 'em.

Cheers, Will.
"Each poet that I know (he said)
has something funny in his head..." CJD

Leonie

Re: THE FIRST REVIEW - Graham Fredriksen

Post by Leonie » Tue Feb 22, 2011 10:22 pm

Gotta admit it's hard to argue with that. He's right when he says that's why the masters lasted, because they never settled for 'near enough', and neither did he by the look of it. Another good one. Oh to be able to write like that.

Leonie

Re: THE FIRST REVIEW - Graham Fredriksen

Post by Leonie » Wed Feb 23, 2011 9:34 am

I think one of the reasons this one works in spite of the apparent 'near enough' internal rhymes is because they are internal rhymes. They don't jar like a 'near enough' end rhyme would. But I take your point, like I said in another post, confusion reigns, and trying to understand the finer points just makes my head hurt. :?

manfredvijars

Re: THE FIRST REVIEW - Graham Fredriksen

Post by manfredvijars » Wed Feb 23, 2011 9:58 am

Part of understanding 'rules', means identifying the elements (of poetry), namely "rhymes" - Masculine and Feminine or hard and soft rhymes

eg.
moon - June are masculine or 'hard' (single syllable) rhymes

whereas
Eyeballs , Bibles
Humour, assume a
Spirit, hear it
Lasted, Masthead
Rhyme it, Climate

are feminine or 'soft' (two syllable rhymes) rhymes ..

With feminine rhymes the emphasis and stress is on (in this case) the first syllable.


Graham wrote it 'right' ... :)

PS. frequently Graham would "dumb down" a piece(his words) before submitting to a competition. With three Bronze Swagmen and a host of other accolades, he must have done something 'right'.

Hully

Re: THE FIRST REVIEW - Graham Fredriksen

Post by Hully » Wed Feb 23, 2011 10:02 am

hear hear Graham Fredriksen.
Hear HERE ! !

h

manfredvijars

Re: THE FIRST REVIEW - Graham Fredriksen

Post by manfredvijars » Wed Feb 23, 2011 10:43 am

First and foremost if we want to write, I believe we have to write for ourselves. Our individual subject matter is subjective (pun intended) as is the judging of any pieces we set free. Because our 'babies' are dear to us, some critiques (and criticism) cuts us to the quick. There are many pieces that will never see the light of day because they are very personal. So, to protect my fragile sensitivities, I won't release them. Yet they are the ones that should be 'set free'.

One reality is, when I write something I see the piece through a specific lense - distinctly different to the ones that others may view that same piece through.

Just accept that there's 'difference' in the world.
I do .... :)

Leonie

Re: THE FIRST REVIEW - Graham Fredriksen

Post by Leonie » Wed Feb 23, 2011 10:47 am

Who was it who said something along the lines of - 'the more I learn the less I seem to know'? I think I know how he felt, but thanks for explaining those rhymes Manfred. :) In reality it never hurts to learn a little more, hurting head notwithstanding. ;)

PS ... I think I look at mine through a different lense too. In my case, probably a rose coloured one. :lol:
Last edited by Leonie on Wed Feb 23, 2011 10:50 am, edited 1 time in total.

manfredvijars

Re: THE FIRST REVIEW - Graham Fredriksen

Post by manfredvijars » Wed Feb 23, 2011 2:53 pm

... Ahhhh just remember Mate, you're "Special and Unique" - just like everyone else in the World ... :D

Neville Briggs
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Re: THE FIRST REVIEW - Graham Fredriksen

Post by Neville Briggs » Wed Feb 23, 2011 3:44 pm

I think I know where Graham Fredericksen was coming from in his poem above.

There are a lot of factors that contribute to the lamentable situation outlined by Graham.

The examples that he has given, I think, point to a lack of grounding in the fundamentals of verse writing ( the tricky stuff we can argue about forever )
I think a lot of our bush poets just haven't been given the " good oil " and have been just doing their best without really understanding the basic nature of poetic form.

I know that there is a section on this site for education and people like Carmel Randle have put out some literature for education, but the message doesn't seem to reach as widely as we might expect. Correct me if I'm wrong.

My suggestion, if anyone is out there listening, is that all the clubs and groups might consider putting a major effort into running some writing or performing workshops for the education of our bush poets.
They should be cheaper and easier to run than competitions.

Singleton Bush Poets club has run three of these events.
Some of the people I saw as learners in Jim Haynes' workshop of a few years ago are now considered top writers and performers. Last year we had a writing and performing workshop run by Glenny Palmer and I am sure that the people who attended , came out of that much the wiser.

Can't think of any other points at the moment ?.....................but I will :roll:
Neville
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.

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